To shape up agin', here's a practive drill your all you lubbers, to get into shape, courtesy of Cap'n Slappy's web site-
* Organize a pirate-themed knitting bee.
* Purchase copies of pirate classics and have a "read-along" at a lock-down facility for the criminally twitchy.
* Quietly contemplate the meaning of "Booty"
* Get blistering drunk on rum with yer mates and puke in the neighbor's Zen garden.
* Sponsor a lecture on the complicated psyche of the man and cultural zeitgeist of the world in which Edward "Blackbeard" Teach lived.
* Hold a muffin baking contest!
* Randomly call people at their place of employment and yell, "ARRRR!" into the telephone. (THIS is Porcupine's personal favorite!)
* Get a tattoo featuring the likeness of soulful basso profundo crooner, the late, great Barry White! (so smooth! so DE-val!)
Now, w'Cap' Devvy workin' to put the swabs o' Mass to work on a plan to lighten the gentry of their doubloons in a gamin' parlour and pass of the Black Spot to high-faced pension boards, it behooves us all to sling the lingo and sharpen the cutlass, as we prepare for boardin' on the other states of the S.S. New England. Let's do Cap'n Devvy proud, and show 'ow little we care for Injuns when there's booty to be had!